on insomnia

yep.  i’m still awake.

and, it’s snowing.

i’ve been up since 1 am, and now, it’s 3:45 am, and i have to be up at 8:30 am so that i can venture into the world to work in my ARTgarage studio (and attend the ARTgarage’s annual celebration of existing–i think?  evidently, i wasn’t paying attention.).

ya know, instead of working in my home studio where i can nap whenever the murder-machine decides i need to sleep~

so, i guess this is less “on insomnia” and more “ramblings that are insomnia-adjacent”–but, omg, this really is anxiety-induced insomnia–since i continue to suck at updating this, my primary site.  (it feels less and less primary all the time, and i’m not sure why.  okay, that’s a lie.  it’s because there’s less immediacy to it than other social media platforms for me–mostly because i always feel like i need to be on my laptop to update here, which is somewhat true for something–but that’s all really a lie because, ya know, there’s a wordpress app.

i have it on my phone and everything~

however, i do actually have a fairly reasonable reason as to why there hasn’t been much in the way of updating since i got back from nerdcon:  epic busy-ness (or, business.  PUN!).

because of nerdcon preparations, i have been putting off working on any of the ideas i had for my next quarter installation at the ARTgarage, which installs at the beginning of november. and i’m currently worried that i don’t have an impressive enough piece because i’m directly off the main gallery this time.

i mean.  i do have a fairly impressive piece (i think), but i just don’t know if it’s actually enough of a piece or if i should fall back on paintings because ~holiday season~, and maybe, i just shouldn’t try and challenge people too much at this time of year?

(my wall so needs to be painted.  but!  i really enjoy the shadow-echoes of paintings past, so–)

i’m not sure s(emiotic)ympathies is precisely challenging–although, it’s wanting to be a series despite me thinking it was part of the untitled series of art about art–but then again, what i think is artistically challenging and what the rest of the world considers challenging are often not the same thing?  (i think this may also be where the untitled series of art about art crosses paths with the spindles work, Zellandine’s denouement series?  conceptually.  not materially.)

so–that’s weighing on the way.

there’s also preparations for the ARTgarage’s holiday show/shop thing–which i’m feeling woefully behind on because when aren’t i woefully behind?–which starts on the 14th, and then there’s a gallery nite hard on it’s heels on the 19th, and i’m just HOW DO I HAVE ENOUGH STUFF FOR BOTH OF THEM?!?!?!?!?!?  but, the answer’s simple:  worry about the holiday show/shop because weeks duration and bring other things to gallery nite (or bring nothing and just demo because that’s always so much less stress until i have to decide what to demo).

…it also doesn’t help that i’m basically playing hurry-up-and-wait about more cons to show at because con season is kinda, mostly over?

there’s been major adulting too.  like, i now have an official business account for tentacle-made studios (which is freaking me right out), which means that i’m having to do things like update my paypal (and upgrade my paypal) and set-up business accounts different places and–yeah.  ADULTING.

(i still need to have a sit-down with the in-laws:  wisconsin edition because they want me to design a shingle for linda’s lamp business.  and, theoretically–NOW THAT THINGS HAVE CALMED DOWN NOT AT ALL–i should try and find time to speak with angie about showing things at the cafe.)

…this may have just become the LIST OF THINGS I NEED TO DO AND THINGS I’VE DONE.

thank you for participating in this with me.

on the side of things that’s a little less angst-ridden-anxiety-inducing, i just ordered a bunch of materials that’ll be coming along next week:  super-basic materials for screenprinting (because it’s possible to do it without all the contraptions???!!!!!???!?!?!?!?!); more bookboards because i sold most of my handmade books at nerdcon (!!!!!!!); copics, of course, because i need ALL THE COPICS; and an encaustic starter set because encaustics.


and, maybe more opera pieces since i now have met opera on-demand!!!!!!!!

(i think i might finally start in on the winter lights series i’ve had in my head for about a year-and-a-half since my winter-work always seems to involve light because i have SAD issues that i wasn’t aware that i had until i moved to wisconsin.

wisconsin:  the state that keeps on screwing me over giving.

i’m also allergic to everything in wisconsin.  wtaf.)

okay, i’m going to try to sleep some more.  maybe.


*clutches at yorrick*

courage, y’all.

p.s.:  i’m trying the newsletter thing again?  so, i now have a tinyletter if any of y’all are interested.

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p.p.s.:  if you’re doing nanowrimo this year, look me up.

p.p.p.s:  if you haven’t watched freakylinks, you should.

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